Go your own way

It is a strange thing to begin something like this during such an unprecedented time. I have had a lot come up in last few days and I’ve written quite a bit, but I finally realized this morning what I need to say most.

I have been noticing that there is a lot of self-imposed, society-imposed, and social media-imposed expectation, pressure and judgment about the way people are handling this situation. And I even hesitated last night to post a photo of a craft project because I didn’t want others to feel the pressure to be productive.

These are uncharted waters for everyone. We are each in different situations, we are each different people and we are each going to experience this differently. There is a common saying about grief that there is no one right way to grieve. There is grief here and there is more. And it is so true – there is no one right way to navigate this, any of it. And the worst thing we can do to ourselves and to each other in experiencing it is to place doubt, pressure, expectation, judgment or shame on how we are navigating this, because that just makes it worse.

On Tuesday night, a dear friend sent me some reflections on the post I had sent out. She knows that I’m well-intentioned but shared that some of what I shared might have come across to some as insensitive to what others are experiencing.

I don’t regret what I shared because it is myexperience and where I am at, but I am so grateful for her feedback and for the subsequent reflections because it has given me an increased understanding of the responsibility I carry connecting with you during these incredibly difficult times. It also helped me to clarify something very important: The point of The Connected Wayis for you to feel connected, supported and seen. And I do not, in my actions or words, in any circumstance, want you to feel alienated, alone or unseen. And I for sure don’t want to contribute to you feeling that doubt, pressure, expectation, judgment or shame.

For each of the unique circumstances we are in, we are also each a unique being, and our responses on a physical, mental, emotional and spiritual level are unique unto themselves. And those can change day-to-day and minute-to-minute (it has for me). I commit to showing up here with as much empathy and understanding as I can of our unique expressions, experiences and the challenges of these times.

I want to reiterate that there is no right way to do this; you can go your own way. Honor where your circumstances and your body, mind and spirit are needing to go, and let yourself go there. You may be in hyper-survival mode, hyper-responsibility mode, hyper-productivity mode, hyper-safety-cocooning mode, hyper-check-out mode, hyper-scared mode, hyper-hope mode, so many other modes, and everything in between. Nothing you do is wrong and I hope you will honor what you need for you and for those. And I hope that you will not question, pressure, expect, judge or shame yourself or others for your way or their way. Be kind to yourself and others as we all experience this in our own unique way. And if you need a reminder or some support, you can always listen to this (been singing it in my head all day).

We are all connected and we are in this together. So, no matter your circumstances and no matter your experience, I see you and I honor you. And because of my personal circumstances, I have the bandwidth and the desire to be of service and support others – I believe there is a reason I have that bandwidth and I don’t take that lightly. So, if you need anything, please reach out, I am here. This continues to be an experiment and a collective experience, so I will continue to learn and ask that you please let me know if you have feedback or ideas – I am open. I will continue to reach out to as I feel called to, and my goal will remain to help you feel connected, supported and seen.

Thanks for being here and I am sending you love, light, health, healing and peace wherever and however you are.

In love and light,

Devin Green

The Connected Way